Saturday, August 13, 2005

Ha ha !!! Stupid Losers

"We Are the Greatest War People"

"Let's march to war and to victory
Let's gain the upper-upperhand
Let's show the world what we're made of
Let's hear it throughout this golden land

God bless our really awesome War Machine
God bless the cannon and the gun
God bless the advances in technology
We can kill and never have to run"

The good General, J.C. Christian, led me to MJS, who introduced the Republican fight song at Mortaljive.

Although anxious to appear ready to fight, many young Republicans are hopeful that their parents will shoo away military recruiters from their door like this manly young almost Marine in Pittburgh, whose mommy politely, but firmly showed the recruiter the door.

Staff Sgt. Jason Rivera, 26, a Marine recruiter in Pittsburgh, went to the home of a high school student who had expressed interest in joining the Marine Reserve to talk to his parents.

It was a large home in a well-to-do suburb north of the city. Two American flags adorned the yard. The prospect's mom greeted him wearing an American flag T-shirt.

"I want you to know we support you," she gushed.

Rivera soon reached the limits of her support.

"Military service isn't for our son. It isn't for our kind of people," she told him."

Sometimes mom and dad are busy and young Republicans have to fend for themselves. Certainly, in cases like this there is nothing better than a medical disablility to provide the excuse for avoiding service. Jesus' General is working on one of the most prominant Republicans in the country to become the spokesman for a particularly debilitation medical condition. The General appeals to no less a heavyweight than, the voice of the Republican Party, Rush Limbaugh.

"You used a pilonidal cyst (basically an ingrown hair on your butt) to avoid going to Vietnam. More importantly, you did so without damaging your prospects for becoming conservatism's brightest superstar.

That's why I'm asking Our Leader to declare the month of September to be National Pilonidal Cyst Awareness Month. I hope you will consider becoming our spokesman. We need you to provide visibility for the cause, so that young conservatives can proudly answer their critics by declaring that they wanted to join the military butt were barred from doing so because they had pimply asses."

The President's challenge is clear. The flower of America's youth must be sacrificed in Iraq, so he can look presidential. Well, the flower of the lower income, non-college educated and available to die, American youth. Those so foolish, poor or patriotic to feel it is their duty to serve. The rest, like Rush and his young Republican "dittoheads" will be there to cheer them on.

Let's all sing the chorus together!

"We are the Warrior People of America
We have a war whenever we like
We like to blow up things into smithereens
We make orphans and widows with each strike
(shout)
Never run!
Never cry!
Never waver!
Never die!
We are the greatest War People!
Only losers ask that stupid question "Why?"
Only losers ask that stupid question "Why?"
(photo and music by Mortaljive)